On days like this, when the weather outside is far from frightful and nothing but delightful, the last thing I want to think about is providing value to anyone. What’s that? Provide value? I see this term everywhere. “You have to provide others something of value before you ask for something of value….I’m not really quoting anyone, but this is often the beginning of the dialogue. If you listen to people like Gary with a V or other marketable characters, they are so good at showing how REAL they are. They are great at tapping into the emotional pulse of any given material moment. Don’t get me wrong, I admire anyone who has developed jobs for others. I’ve not built a business, so who am I to judge someone who has?
So, what’s real about me? When I am in the darkest of dark places, you’ll find me curled up in a ball singing to myself, “Jesus loves me this I know for the Bible tells me so.” That’s a trick I learned a few years ago to make the darkness go away, and it brings things back into alignment for me. With all the medications I take, I am a vexed chemical wave of transfiguration on the go. I mean it’s crazy. One day, I may have a few great hours. The next day, I may have a couple NORMAL hours. This is the reason why a traditional work environment will not manifest itself for me. I will end up on the floor like I did at the LAST place I worked.
I’ll never work again. That’s not to say that I will remain on disability. I am saying that I am determined to find a way to use what I have available to me to make a living. I believe my body is still healing from the car accident that I was in. I think there are more GOOD hours in the day to be had. I also know there is a way to team up with others in a way that is advantageous to the whole. You just have to want to be a part of something unique, and perhaps open your mind a bit. You may have a HUGE impact on someone you’ve never MEET.
That’s exciting to me….the mystery of it all.