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God, me, and wait for it….

 

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Snow pup

abilities. Have you ever sat on the beach and just watched the ocean? You watch the waves roll in, gently kissing the shore. Then, when there’s a storm the water lashes out like a wicked comedian talking about whatever may be the trending hot button of the day.

 It’s a New Year.

I was sitting next to a man of influence. He is a very nice man. We were going through some training, and we had to share pieces of our story with each other. I mentioned to him that I have epilepsy. He pounced on it. Before I could say that it is a struggle, he told me not to look at it as a disability. I agree. At the same time, it is an invisible disorder or it was recently classified a disease. I suspect it was classified a disease so that more research dollars may be driven toward it from the National Institute of Health. THIS IS A MUCH MISUNDERSTOOD ISSUE. The struggle is real. To my friends that have epilepsy, know your triggers. For me it’s pressure/stress, lack of sleep, and a few others. Take a deep breath, close your eyes, and know that your mind is powerful beyond what you may realize. This is true for all people. #staystrong #meditate #yoga #prayer

I’m tired.

You know what I mean? Last year, I was at a service called Celebrate Recovery. While there, I began talking to a man – a crack addict. I asked him what was wrong. He said, “I’m tired, I’m just so tired. I don’t want to live.”

Can you imagine feeling that tired? Do you feel THAT tired ALL the time? I’ve never experienced chemotherapy, but I suspect you are very tired and weak afterwards. You didn’t choose cancer though. This guy chose crack, right? He certainly fell into the situation not unlike Adam’s fall from grace in the Bible (FYI….not pointing the finger at women for original sin). Astounding the way religion treats women isn’t it? Thank you Christians, thank you Muslims….thank you men, thank you women….pardon the sarcasm. There are reasons why I am divorced.

Are you misunderstood?

I am. I have an amazing gift of alienating people. Believe it or not, it’s often times at a moment in time that is good for them. I didn’t realize that this is a gift until some time ago. However by observing my mentor/coach Aaron Hairston, I’ve realized that sometimes you have to give people permission to leave your life. Or, you have to ask permission to go. In other words, you must speak the truth in love.

Keep in mind, if permission is not granted, there’s something to work out in the relationship. HA!

Have you ever met someone that is so direct that their words are like bullets to your head? Hi, my name is Tad. I never realized how badly I hurt people with the way I say things. Mind you, my actions have caused more destruction in my life through the years. Words, however, are powerful. Truly clueless….

What’s your thing?

The pastor at the church I attend jokingly asked once, “what is your greatest sin?” I thought about it for a quick second, and the first thought that popped into my mind is that I hate everyone. On the flip side, I love everyone – deeply, to the point it hurts. Believe it or not….it’s true. It is literally physically painful. Maybe that’s where the hate comes from….the pain. Anyway, Aaron once said in one or his videos that he realized at one point that his pain is not for him. It’s not. #boom. A light bulb turned on for me, my pain is not for me. So, how do I find my identity. What’s the secret?

 

 

 

 

 

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